Official leaked dark souls 2 covenants

• Katie:

  You must journey to the ancient land of texas

• Hank:

  Do I have to recover the souls of the four greatest warriors of the Alamo

• Katie:

  Yes and place the vessel of democracy to kindle the lone star

• Hank:

  Will that open the gate for me to battle US Immigration Reform

• Katie:

  You must fight your way to the kiln of the first election to battle Obama, lord of the liberals

• Hank:

  Can I use my +5 Second Amendment Shotgun?

• Katie:

  Only if you have 18 conservatism

• Hank:

  That would also enable me to use the miracle Vow of Marriage, preventing any gay rights from being gained within a six foot radius of me

• Katie:

  Only if you're in the republican covenant

• Hank:

  What do I look like, an Independant Voter? Jeezz, give me some credit

• Katie:

  Pfft whatever at least the Democrat covenant boosts your soul gains

• Hank:

  Yeah but you're open to invasions from socialists

• Katie:

  Yeah but come on those assholes are only dangerous if there's like a mob of them if you get just one they're missing half their armor and shit it's pathetic

• Hank:

  At least we Republicans get the Insider Trading Ring to boost our item discovery

• Katie:

  Yeah but the Politically Correct miracle boosts defense against Republican sorceries

• Hank:

  It doesn't matter, we have the Government Bailout shield that prevents us from losing any souls when we die

• Katie:

  Have you forgotten that any 5+ republican can no longer gain humanity

• Hank:

  We don't need it anymore, we got the ability to invade whenever we want right after the 9/11 patch